Paragon

“When you have something to say, silence is a lie.”
— Jordan B. Peterson, 12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos

I ran across a interesting article recently in the GVC, one pertaining to a interview and certain references to a “torchbearer” if I’m not mistaken. In any regard to this I had thoughts and reflections I’ve come to realize over my long stay in the GVC. Here are some suggestions below. Also I hope this is helpful for new individuals in the GVC to read. This is only one part in a multi part series to keep in mind.

1. Responsibility


Everyone who is a party to the community shares a certain role in its construction or destruction. Every action or utterance towards one facet or the other. Everyone also shares in it’s benefits there in either through first walking in or being a part of the community for a extended period of time.

It is with that in mind everyone shares a equal responsibility keeping it up to date. The “Not my job” mentality has become the prevalent attitude across the community. In a complex ecosystem of various groups and boards it’s become all to common for individuals to absolve any responsibility for anything there in. If everyone took responsibility for just what they are doing things would flow smoother.

It’s also become a epidemic to blame others for the state of the community. People will bemoan a person or a group without doing anything to try to change the issue at hand. The first step the community needs to take is personal responsibility.

People may question “What do you mean?”. I mean that going forward our authorship of what ever we make of this is solely placed on the individuals who make up its parts. Don’t want drama? Don’t spread it. Want something built? Take charge and build it or ask people to help you with it.

These items below are things I think that should be expressed that are commonly eluded to but never really focused on in the community relating and pertaining to responsibility. It’s like hiking in the woods, if you don’t pack out your trash then you’ve made the whole area a dumping ground.

  • You have the personal responsibility to manage your condition(s). The GVC takes no responsibility in managing your blood or energy intake or other non-related medical conditions.

  • You have a personal responsibility to keep your emotions in check. This is huge. “He made me angry by saying this”. No. You made yourself angry. You allowed someone else to manipulate your emotions. You are responsible for your emotional state. You manage it. You don’t let it manage you.

  • You have the personal responsibility of privately settling disputes within reason. If you can’t or are unable to there are some individuals who will mediate for you in certain situations. If they can’t be settled then there is something called a block button.

  • You’re responsible for what you put in and what you take away. That means if you say something then you own it. It’s yours. It’s no one else’s. No one made you say a thing.

  • You are responsible for your own order. Keeping up with things can be challenging. I get that. We get that. It’s however your responsibility to keep up with your own organization. This goes out to EVERY SINGLE PERSON who decides “I’m going to start a group”.

  • You are responsible for your own research, your own engagement, your own advancement and utilization of your talents. If you read something, read something else that’s different, research, expand, grow. You can get as detailed as you want or just to the point where you manage “Just being” comfortably.

  • There are support groups. There are people who volunteer their time as they wish. Take it or leave it. Take their advice or don’t. If you do not take their advice then that is solely on you. If you reject everyone’s suggestions and cry about not advancing then that is solely on you. Getting help and support takes your initiative on your part to engage with said help. We aren’t going to hunt you down and council you.

2. Communication


I will attempt to cover this. Arietis has created a networking page where you can list your group and location and contact for that group. We will be taking submissions to add to this database. The address is https://arietisnetwork.com/networkadd .

As for the community at large I personally believe every group needs a assigned contact person that’s easily reached. If you just formed a group or have a established group you may want to make it easy to contact a representative of that group. A good representative should be able to answer questions about the group in general and provide information.

I can’t tell you how many groups I ran across over the years with no admin details, no contact details, no email, etc. Just a website that’s dead and empty and a dead end. No life. Devoid.

There should also be a way to communicate across groups. If you professional respect someone you should have the decency or means to communicate to them. A email? a random board area they check? A facebook page or profile.

I’d recommend focusing on this if you’re starting out with a new group.

  1. Make sure to have someone appointed in your group that is agreeable to communicate with.

  2. Someone who timely response to emails.

  3. A easy way of communicating with that person

Another issue with communication is clear communication to others. What and how you communicate says a lot about you. If the first thing you say to someone is negative then that negativity will end up sticking with you in their mind and it develops extra work to resolve it. If all you talk about is drama then people will tend to reflect on you as being highly interested in the very least in drama. If you are always negative in your communications then people will always see you as the person who is always down. Before you communicate think about what you’re going to say. I know that seems revolutionary or obvious but I think it’s a missed step.

3. Mindfulness


mind·ful·ness
/ˈmīn(d)f(ə)lnəs/
noun
1.
the quality or state of being conscious or aware of something.
”their mindfulness of the wider cinematic tradition”
2.
a mental state achieved by focusing one’s awareness on the present moment, while calmly acknowledging and accepting one’s feelings, thoughts, and bodily sensations, used as a therapeutic technique.
— Dictionary

The GVC I think needs to work on this ability. I’ve been at this 15 years and there are hundreds of groups I don’t know. There are tens of thousands of people I don’t know. It would be almost impossible to know everybody in the community. Not everyone will have the same experience or background as you do. They won’t all know the same thing or be subjected to the same amount of information.

If you’re new approach community members with respect. Elders have things they are doing. They have jobs, lives, families and their own responsibilities.

If you’re a elder take time to listen to individuals who approach you. Even if it’s 15 minutes a day. Even if it’s a small message. Remember that awakening was scary as hell for most people. You’re dealing with people that could be going through a emotional experience.

Be mindful that not everyone is going to think exactly like you.


4.Structure

I’ve noticed a myriad of groups arise lacking organization. This can be useful in some aspects but in other aspects it can be destructive. Clear goals, mission statements, beliefs and ideas are cornerstones of healthy organizations. Things that a organization are committed to beyond themselves are also helpful motivational ideas and having a direct chain of skilled faceted leadership beyond that to support these ideals helps immensely.

It also helps to have incremental goals. One thing at a time. Small things to build on. Having the discipline to set down and perform a task daily or weekly to work towards a greater goal.

It also helps to have a clear command structure, clear rules, clear delegated tasks, clear motives, clear design and in general clarity of how things should operate so you can stick to that and members can adhere to that. I’ll give a example below.

OVC GROUP A(large group)

  • Leader(Alpha){owner or main manger} Creates groups, works with group to create policy, procedure. Helps mold the group. Trains the moderators.

  • Admins(Beta, Charlie, Echo){Assistant managers} Beta implements group policy on Facebook,Charlie on Discord, Echo on other social media. Brings information back to Alpha to discuss. Handles the details of the groups. Moderates and make sure everything runs smoothly. Writes up articles.

  • Communications person(Gamma){Specialties manager} Focuses on the appearance of the group, the pr person, helps drafting statements, answers emails, gets the coffee and helps coordinate.

  • Sub Moderators{Hourly shift managers-Trainers-Teachers} These individuals help create a varied amount of content for the group. They do the bulk of the teaching between their combined efforts. These are the most important people in your organization. We’d say there should be several for a group of 100 plus.

  • Rules:A,B,C,D (Make sure they are clearly worded and not nebulous to interpret)

  • Mission statement:To do a thing and provide a thing

  • Personal ideals: We believe in XYZ

  • Members

OVC GROUP B(small group)

  • Leader(Alpha){owner or main manger} Creates group, works with group to create policy, procedure. Helps mold the group. Trains the moderators.

  • Admins(Beta, Charlie, Echo){Assistant managers} Implement group policy in the group. Manage the group, teach the group, adhere to the standards and rules and make sure they are carried out. Echo can serve as the communications person or the Leader. These people should all have assigned tasks and divergent interests to cover a variety of topics.

  • Sub Moderators{Hourly shift managers-Trainers-Teachers} These individuals help create a varied amount of content for the group. They help with moderate teaching. There should be at least 3 and actively trying to train more.

  • Rules:A,B,C,D (Make sure they are clearly worded and not nebulous to interpret)

  • Mission statement:To do a thing and provide a thing

  • Personal ideals: We believe in XYZ

  • Members


That concludes the first part of this series. Again these are always meant to be helpful and hopefully individuals take these ideas back to their individual respective groups and talk about them. At the very least I hope it helps people think a bit outside of the box of what it generally covered in the OVC in regards to politics and structure.

Pusillanimous Introductions

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Intros

A introspective into a common introduction to the OVC.

Something that has been brought to my attention recently, as well as in the past, are a certain hesitance to engage with the greater online vampire community in general by individuals coming into it. New individuals often clash with older more mainstay individuals in the community due to a variety of reasons I’d like to talk about for a few minutes. This article isn’t one to point blame at any one party but help author a bridge between the many facets to facilitate future growth and education.

I was asked by several my thoughts on the topic to aid in a better experience across the board in introduction. I’ve written multiple articles on the subject over the years from various perspectives and this will be a bit of a different view unto that discussion. You would think this would have been solved but I think(as do others) that various ideologies have continued to degrade these links.

First we cover the perspective of someone who approaches the community in a compromised position. All be it this isn’t the best of ways to be introduced to a community under stressful situations but more often than not many are brought into this community in such a manner. There is a a certain air of intimidation felt often by those that don’t automatically fit in or mesh well with the environments they are introduced to.

This is to say that the structures of some organizations maybe alien to certain individuals in their current conception. They may have a hard time understanding what a court or order or other organization is. I can already hear some individuals thinking “Well this has worked. They need to respect the chain of command. They need to respect their elders.’ and if it’s your show I would agree…but at the same time I would also say you’re engaged in the process of diminished returns. You would posit respect is earned on a individual bases so now apply that inverse back towards yourself.

From a new persons perspective they’ve just met you. They have no idea what is going on. It’s a very compromising position to suddenly be poured into a mold that may not fit, have to go through hurdles and obstacles only to be met with snide comments. I can hear the school of hard knocks calling. Again, the refrain of quality over quantity. Again the refrain I would mention would be diminishing returns.

This statement goes to the elders of their respective organizations. Take a few minutes to drop the bravado for a while. Engage with the individual on a person to person bases that you would want to be engaged on. Treat the individual with respect and answer their questions. Take just a few minutes to do this. I personally feel every organization needs a liaison that elders can hand individuals off to if they are taking care of other matters. If this is done I wouldn’t be writing this for you right now. I wouldn’t have dismissed individuals trying to impress me. I wouldn’t have people popping group to group just trying to suck out a nugget as it were trying to find some sort of help.

Many do however do this. I’m not going to praise those individuals in public. They know who they are. If you have a slight suspicion though that your organization hasn’t been seeing many to none of the newer individuals coming into the community who need help, I’d have to tell you…something is very wrong.

On to the next part of this discussion. My personal feelings to benefit the community? I believe personally we need less elders in this community. Less individuals striving to build a organization based for profit, power or personal self gratification of their own personal ego. I believe we need more teachers in this community.

To those who have become confused between the difference in a elder and a teacher? A teacher is someone who is fluid in a role that can sit down, break down the parts of something and teach that skill to another. Many elders possess the ability to do various things but may not always be the most apt individual to teach a subject direct or in a class setting. A elders organizational skills is on leading a organization and a teacher is towards it’s education. One is a functionary over interpersonal relations and ties of the organization and the other is actively engaged in strengthening the core subsets of the individuals who are a part of that organization.

My reasoning behind this is I’ve been apart of various organizations over the years and it’s become a sort of game to throw books at individuals when they walk into the community. While this method may suit certain individuals who are able to learn from a book, generally the wisdom that has prevailed is that we have a teacher to cover the material, answer questions and help in exercisers. This is the most lacking area that’s critical to passing on knowledge in this community. I noticed some of the most successful organizations I’ve been apart of have a group of dedicated teachers. Sadly over time this has degraded though to a handful of people.

With that covered I’d like to make a quick statement to those who are coming into this community that are new. It’s a common practice for some newer individuals to approach the community feeling that they maybe inadequate. There’s no need to trump yourself up. The more time you spend playing yourself up is more time wasted getting help with things you may want to learn, strengthen or get others opinions on. Come as you are with all your faults. It’s with hope that people will engage and help you. I can’t make any promises to that effect. All I can do about that is try.

It’s with hope people take the above constructive criticism and apply changes in hopes that it may help facilitate a better experience across the board.

Sincerely,

Crio